To Sears and back

So, a few weeks ago we were in Texas. The midway point of the trip is Dallas, so we get a hotel room to spend the night there going and coming.

On the way down, our hotel room in Dallas was next to this giant mall. Nice place. They had an ice skating rink on the lower level, lots of nice restaurants and for Adro, some make-up brand had its own store, which was a big deal to her.

For Evey, they had this giant play area. It did look like fun, I'll admit it. She played her heart out on it and after that night, everyday she wanted to go back to what she called "the player."

So then we're in Mission, Texas, for a few days. Deep south Texas. HOT.

We took an afternoon at another mall. This mall wasn't as fancy, as you might expect. First of all, I'm sure it'd be impossible to keep an ice skating rink anywhere in the Rio Grande Valley, because the average temperature there is 2 million degrees.

There was also no "player" for Evey. But there had to be something, right?

I asked the information desk what they had for kids. "Uhm... there's the train... if it's open..."



So me and Evey walked over to JC Penney's to find the train. The train was apparently closed because it was covered up under 10 large sheets. Evey was dejected. We started to walk away.

That's when a man who looked like Mario from Super Mario Bros. walked by me. It occurred to me that he was dressed like a train conductor. I watched him, and, yep, no one -- even in the Valley -- dresses like that for the hell of it. He was the train conductor.

Wanting to make Evey happy, I approached the train conductor and asked him when he'd be open for business. The train conductor shot me a confused look back... he didn't speak English.

"Uhm, cuando... abierto... train?" (broken Spanish -- when open train?)
"Diez minutos." (perfect Spanish -- 10 minutes.)
"Boletos aqui?" (broken Spanish -- tickets here? I wanted to know if I had to buy the tickets from him, or go somewhere else)
"Si, si! dsfnfknlka lskdj ljlsdjkl; lkj sadljd SEARS kljlsj ljsdlk sd jsdaljflasd k." (perfect Spanish -- Yes, yes! Then a bunch of words I don't understand with a SEARS thrown in the middle.)

So me and Evey start heading for Sears to buy our train tickets.

I don't know where Sears is, so we just start walking. I got halfway across this mall when I finally told myself that I must have misunderstood El Conductor. I found a map and saw that Sears was the polar opposite of where the train was.

Frustrated, me and Evey walk back. I'm pissed because 1) I'm in a mall and 2) I'm trying to ride a frickin train for the sake of entertaining Evey and it's much more effort that it could possibly be worth and 3) I really wish this place just had a player. I can read at the player. There's nothing for men at the mall, but at the player I can read the book I've brought with me. Everyone is happy at the player.



I finally get back and the conductor is standing there next to a sign that says "Train Rides! $5." The sign wasn't there 10 minutes ago because he hadn't set it up. So I pull a $10 out of my pocket, hand it to the guy. This was a cash operation, I should have known that we wouldn't need no stinking tickets. Sheesh.

Evey chose the azul (blue) car and we hopped in.

The tour? It went to SEARS and BACK -- that's what the guy was trying to tell me. And it lasted all of 5 minutes. For $10. The player in Dallas? That was free.

So the expression on my face in that second photo? That's why I have that expression.

Little black Corvette

Evey and her cousin Marina in 'Rina's Corvette.

Evey just doesn't have much experience with these fancy toys.

While Marina was practically parallel parking the car, once Evey got behind the wheel, the first thing she did was run into Marina, almost putting her on the hood.

But, like I told the doctor the other day... I'm fine with it if Evey doesn't ride a tricycle for a while. I'm fine with it if she never rides a skateboard. In fact, I'm fine with her playing inside a bubble!

When the hamster bubble for kids comes to stores, that's the day when my little girl will be the first on the block with a new toy!

Whistling while I work

So, I'm back! Well, not yet... I'm waiting at KCI for the girls to pick me up. (Gotta love KCI's screaming free wireless!)

Sunday night I flew out to Milwaukee, Wis. Monday morning I was at Whistling Straits in Kohler, Wis., doing interviews for an upcoming story in GCM. (Whistling Straits will host the 2010 PGA Championship in August.) It's Tuesday at 5:45 p.m. and I'm already back.

It was a good trip! I feel like I made a few new friends up there. I'll have to be sure and do them right and pour my guts into that story.

Sheboygan (where I stayed) was a lot smaller than I thought it'd be... only a town of 50,000. I don't know why but I just figured it'd be at least twice that...

Anyway, I got a lot of great golf course photos while out there, I'll try to post one or two more later this week. Looking forward to the PGA Championship, the Straits Course looks like a fierce test of golf.

Happy Father's Day!

I hope all the dads had a great father's day! I had a really great day... started off playing 18 with the Neuteboom's (Eric and his dad, J.P., and his mom, Connie). Then home for some relaxation and U.S. Open golf on TV. Plus, the girls got me "Book of Eli" on DVD and a cool mini-desk that you can use when sitting on the couch (which I do a lot of!)

***

The Jones family had a busy weekend as we had a garage sale on Saturday. We didn't sell any of our big-ticket items, but we still made $150 and got a ton of junk out of our garage! You should see our garage now... I'm so proud of it, I almost want to run downstairs and take a photo of it!

***

Evey's stomach update: Evey is now using her stomach for all sorts of negotiations. The stomach tells us when she's hungry, not hungry, when she should watch a movie, when she should get to stay up late... I'm really getting sick of this stomach. Evey's a sweetie, but this stomach is pretty fricking demanding.

The voice in Evey's stomach

I made a huge comeback from this time yesterday. I think it's because we put the July issue of the magazine to bed today. But Thursday sounds do-able. And the next thing we know... it's Friday morning, and USA has a World Cup game.

(But we've also got a game 7 tomorrow night... good stuff!)

***

Evey took a new approach to trying to get out of eating dinner tonight: using her stomach as a negotiator. It went like this:

Evey: Uhm, Mom, Dad... my stomach told me it doesn't want to eat anymore food. It told me that I should ask if I can go Watch Wall-E, and that you would say 'yes!'

Me: Well, tell your stomach that's crazy-talk, because not only have you not eaten enough dinner yet, but you haven't been excused yet. So you need to take two more bites, at least...

Evey: But Dad! My stomach says that it doesn't want to eat anymore food.

Me: Did I miss something? Did Mom make you two sandwiches? Because before you can eat 'any more' food you first have to eat food...

Evey: Yes, Mom made me five sandwiches.

Me: FIVE SANDWICHES?!?

Evey: Yes, FIVE! And my stomach says it doesn't want any more.

Me: Well, tell your stomach to get ready for one more, because that sandwich on your plate doesn't even look like it's been touched! And it's got to get eaten if you want to watch Wall-E at all tonight!

Apparently, this silenced the voice in Evey's stomach because she was all of a sudden inspired to eat again, voice in her belly be damned...

It's only Tuesday?

It feels like it should be Thursday! This week is kicking my ass already, and we're only two days in!!!

***

I planted a garden this year. It the first time I've tried this. So far, it's looking pretty good! I planted tomatoes (3 plants), peppers (two plants), cucumbers (two plants) and leeks.

I picked my first tomato yesterday. It's about the size of a racquetball.

I'm new to this, so a racquetball-sized tomato is a big deal to me! I've already surpassed expectations!

I'll try to get a photo of the garden up on the blog. Because I know you're DYING to see it now...

***

The Lakers get a game 7. I hope it's a good one, and I hope L.A. wins. I've been watching the NBA playoffs closer than I maybe ever have. And it's not just because I like seeing the hamsters rap Black Sheep's "You Can Get With This."

(My favorite part is the hamster that has the piece of cardboard to break dance on.)

Doo, dah, dippity!

Happy birthday Sis!

My Sister had a birthday this weekend! Happy birthday Jess!

TGIF!

Kick back. Relax.

Kids, say, "What-a-Burger!"

Here are a couple photos from our last What-a-Burger stop, in Stillwater, Okla. Travis and his kids, Emery and Emma, were nice enough to drive out and meet us.

The company was good, but the service was BAD. When I ordered, the kid shot me straight. "It might take a while," he sighed, sweat visibly dripping from his brow. "We've got problems back here...."

Apparently there was a little league baseball tournament in town, and they weren't prepared. They also started running out of some basics -- small buns, barbecue sauce, ice... these guys didn't realize the importance of our visit there -- that this would be our LAST FORESEEABLE What-a-Burger stop for maybe as long as a year.

Oh well. The food was still pretty good. And it's always good to see Trav and his family.

***

Evey watched a little bit of the Lakers/Celts game with me tonight. She told me she wanted to "play soccer ball too." I told her I'd be happy to teach her the game. Then she asked for more: she wanted to play at the TD Garden, where the Celtics play in Boston. That's a taller order... we'll have to work on that one.

***

I was so freaking hungry on the way home from work today, I almost started eating a slice of bread out of a grocery bag. I also almost bought one of those churros from Quicktrip, except for the fact that I didn't go inside Quicktrip because it was pouring rain. But have you ever been hungry like that? Where it just drives you crazy, and you could eat, like, a raw potato?

I didn't even take off my shoes once I got home. I cooked grilled cheese sandwiches and tomato soup. I had it all ready in about five minutes. I was so freaking hungry, even the tomato soup tasted good! I ate two sandwiches and a giant cup of soup in about ten minutes. And finally, my hunger was gone.

Sheesh. Could you imagine the damage I could have done at Peking Taste?

I think I'm going to have to add another meal to my daily eating schedule. It'll be called "post-lunch" and it will be designed to get me through the 20-minute drive from work to Eudora. I will eat this meal at 4 p.m. The meal will consist of simple things, like bananas, crackers and Quicktrip churros.

Really, this is the best idea I've had in like two weeks.

Speaking of cousins...

Evey has a new cousin!

His name is Dexter Wolfgang and he's the son of Brent and Rosalina. He was born in late April, I believe, and we got to meet him on Mother's Day. Evey's a big fan of her new cousin!

Here are photos of the proud Mom with her baby boy and Virginia with her second great-grandchild. Congrats, Brent and Rosalina!

***

A couple of Evey developmental tidbits...

We took Evey in her for 3-year checkup recently. The doctor seemed happy with the way Evey is growing (Though honestly, she's not easy to read... I think I could have brought Tyra Banks into the doctor's office and told the doctor, "This is my 3-year-old," and she would still show no emotion). But Evey measured in the 75th percentile on weight, and the 92nd percentile on height. So she's a big girl, growing fast. At this rate, she'll be 11 feet tall by the time she's 20. (And the doctor won't raise an eyebrow.)

Also, today Adro wore a "Livestrong" T-shirt. Evey saw it, and pointed to each letter and spelled it back correctly... "L-I-V-E-S-T-R-O-N-G."

And so I'm not being totally FoxNews and reporting only one side of the story, she also warned me to be careful at the volleyball court today because "the worms might get you."

Last month @ the Pearl Jam concert

Here's a good pic of me and Adro before the Pearl Jam concert last month.

And here's a good shot of the lads in action... and it is in action, check out the tambourine in mid-flight being tossed to Eddie by the roadie in the lower right-hand corner!

Me and my cousins, you and your cousins

I can feel it coming.

Pretty cool song, really solid album, too. Vampire Weekend, "Contra." I think Adro nailed it when she said it was like "modern Simon and Garfunkel."

Happy birthday!

To Grandma Judy and Mike! Evey got you flowers...

Amelia, Evey, Sandbox

Here's a photo of Amelia and Evey playing at Greyson's 4th birthday party. We need to get Amelia over to our house soon, these girls have a lot of playing together to do!

***

If Mangino got fired for poking a player in the chest, don't you think Perkins should be fired for letting over $1 million in tickets walk out the back door? And getting freebie workout equipment?

In my opinion, Perkins should be gone before the weekend gets here.